Plight of the youngest child

Peanut is almost 22 months old -- the age that Jellybean was when Peanut was born. For some reason, I see this as a milestone worthy of introspection.

I remember being so glad and relieved that little Jellybean was in a baby-loving phase as my belly expanded with Peanut. "Oh please, let this phase continue until this baby is born," I thought at the time. As it turns out, the phase did continue -- until about the time Peanut could pull herself up to stand and get in Jellybean's business -- and Jellybean hugged and kissed her baby sister every chance she got.

Now, I see that Peanut is fascinated with babies. She points out every baby she sees and says, "Aww, she's cute." Or, "Isn't she sweet?" When Jellybean was that age, I could say things like, "Soon we'll have a baby at our house," and she would be excited. I can't help but be a little sad for Peanut, that she won't have the chance to have a real baby at her house. We're done having babies at our house. Never say never, but I can't conceive of (pun intended) how it would happen.

It's ironic to me that I feel a bit sad for Peanut about the lack of a younger sibling for her. I used to feel sad for Jellybean that she WOULD have a younger sibling. Toward the end of my pregnancy with Peanut, hormones blazing, I used to cry about how Jellybean was going to have her little world turned upside down when we brought the new baby home. There certainly were a few moments that Jellybean felt like that, but now and ever since, she always wants to know where Peanut is and how she's doing. They love each other more than I can comprehend.

Which brings me back to my original train of thought. Why should I feel sad for Peanut? She has it pretty good. No one is going to suddenly enter her life and take over Mom and Dad's attention for months on end -- not to mention cry in the night to be fed or scream the whole time in the bath tub. In the meantime, she can dote on all the babies we see -- and there will soon be a new one in our neighborhood, in addition to the sweet 8-month-old behind us. She can also continue taking care of all the babies in our house, rocking them and putting them night-night. I think she actually has the best of both worlds.

And don't try to say the sadness I feel for her is actually MY sadness. I have what I can handle with two kids, and I know that. I also like to sleep all night.

The new Facebook

L and I have been into Facebook now for a few months. We frequently discuss it around the house, as in, "Now I'm friends with such-and-such on Facebook..."

Apparently, the kids have noticed our conversations about Facebooking (yes, it's a verb, because "social networking" just doesn't capture it). Peanut came up to me this morning and said, "I want Facebook." I was like, "What?"

She ran away and returned clutching a board book in her hands. "Mama, read Facebook please." So, there you have it: Here is Facebook for the under-4 set. Now I know why this book has been incorporated into so much playing lately. They think they're Facebooking!

A patchwork dilemma

Jellybean has a blanket that she loves. She sleeps with it every night and at every nap. It's not just a blanket; it's a handmade quilt that L's grandma made when L was a baby. It's the perfect size, it's pretty and it's warm. But, it's falling apart and needs repair desperately.

We used to cover Jellybean with it in her crib when she was little, in a rotation with some other handmade blankets from our childhoods. Over time, it became clear that the quilt was her favorite of all her baby blankets. When we moved her to the big-girl bed about a year ago, she insisted that the quilt stay with her. So it has. And it goes on trips with us so she can have it wherever she sleeps (L and I call it her "Linus blanket," although it's not quite that extreme). When she wakes up in the morning, she comes to our room carrying her bear and the quilt. You can see it in the picture where she's sleeping in bed, and it's on her lap in the car seat.

The quilt was already worn, ahem, well loved, when we started using it in her crib. It had some slight tears and frayed edges. Now, several of the patchwork squares are threadbare down to the batting. Other parts of the structure have tears, and the stitchwork on the back panel is slowly coming undone.

My next-door neighbor is a fantastic seamstress and talented quilter. She has a quilting circle that meets regularly, and I've talked to her about finding someone to repair the quilt. She knows people and is willing to make that happen for me.

However, there are short-term and long-term problems with getting the quilt repaired, not the least of which: 1. Jellybean will be without the quilt for some time while it's being fixed. 2. The quilt will be different when it returns -- different fabrics and not as soft from all the wear.

So, do I wait until Jellybean outgrows the need for the quilt, possibly a couple more years, and risk damage to a family heirloom? Or, do we tear off the Band-Aid quickly now, so we can save the blanket but possibly crush a sensitive 3-year-old and her security?

Especially heart-y

For the first time since I was a kid, I allowed myself to get completely swept up in the Valentine's spirit this year. In fact, a midday visit to the grocery store on the 14th gave me a new perspective that will officially convert me from a V-Day cynic for years to come.

I had more advance preparation than ever for Valentine's Day this year because of Jellybean and her preschool activities. I had her write her own name on her Valentines for her classmates, so we started with that project early in the week to get them completed by Thursday. Her enthusiasm about giving a cheap little piece of cardboard to each of her classmates made it hard for me to grumble internally about the commercial concoction that is February 14.

She did all kinds of Valentine art projects at preschool in the preceding days -- all with lots of pink and lots of hearts. My favorite, though, was a card that she decorated with her photo and stickers. She instructed the teachers to write on it, "I love you Mommy and Daddy." It was the simplest yet sweetest thing. How can I be cynical about THAT?

Peanut was very into Valentine's Day too; as long as the celebrating included eating occasional candy treats and coloring with markers on a regular basis, she was in. She called it "Valen-times," which I thought appropriate seeing as how all our prep and build-up were taking almost a week! Good times, Valentimes.

So, even before the 14th, I was sort of in the Valentine mode and not fighting it as I have in the past. But once I got to the grocery store that afternoon (to buy a cake mix and pink frosting and cake decorations -- what is going on with me?!), I became a huge fan of Valentine's Day. The parking lot was so full that I had to wait my turn for a spot. As I was waiting, I watched people pouring into the store. I saw college girls with bouquets of flowers, -- I thought college boys preferred DE-flowering, myself -- anxious men bolting for the florist line (which was about 20 people deep inside the store) and parents holding their children's hands as the latter bounded into the store. And it hit me: Look at all these people going out of their way to show friends and loved ones that they care.

There are wars, both literal and figurative, transpiring all over the world. Financial markets are in shambles. Politics in our country have been bitterly divided. Conflicts going on and on. But on February 14, a whole lot of people in the U.S. felt a whole lot of love. Hallmark should be so proud.

Now we're cookin'

Cooking blog posts are a bit "happy homemaker," but so be it, I am one! I'm not the sort to seek out new recipes and open up a test kitchen, but I've happened upon good recipes that are very easy to prepare and make a yummy meal. Thought I'd share them. They cover the range of food preferences, so there's something for everyone.

This one tastes elaborate and rich with a spicy kick, but it's SO easy. Thank God for Crock-Pots. I've had the best luck with this when I soak the black beans in water for an hour or more first. This is from Real Simple magazine.

Beer-braised pork and black bean soup

2 12-ounce bottles of beer (preferably lager)
1 tablespoon chopped canned chipotle chilies in adobo sauce, plus 1 tablespoon adobo sauce
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 large onion, chopped
1 pound dried black beans, rinsed
1 1/2 pounds boneless pork butt (pork shoulder)
Kosher salt
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup store-bought refrigerated fresh salsa
1/4 cup fresh cilantro

In the bowl of a slow cooker, combine the beer, 3 cups water, the chilies, adobo sauce, cumin, onion, beans, pork, and 1 1/2 teaspoons salt. Set the slow cooker to high and cook, covered, until the beans are tender and the pork pulls apart easily, 4 to 5 1/2 hours. Using a fork, separate the pork into large pieces. Divide among individual bowls and top with the sour cream, salsa, and cilantro.

Here's another Real Simple recipe that takes 20 minutes start to finish (really!). The textures and flavors in this are restaurant quality.

Lemony shrimp with white beans and couscous

1 10-ounce box couscous (1 1/2 cups)
Kosher salt and black pepper
3 tablespoons unsalted butter
2 cloves garlic, chopped
4 scallions, chopped
1 pound medium shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 15.5-ounce can cannellini beans, rinsed
1/2 cup fresh flat-leaf parsley
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

In a saucepan, bring 2 cups water to a boil. Stir in the couscous and 1/4 teaspoon salt. Cover and let sit off heat for 5 minutes; fluff with a fork before serving.

Meanwhile, heat 1 tablespoon of the butter in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add the garlic and scallions and cook for 30 seconds. Add the shrimp and cook, stirring, until they begin to turn pink, about 3 minutes.

This soup, from Mario Batali, is thickened with bread -- hence, the name. You can use whatever vegetables you have on hand. It is much more flavorful than the separate ingredients would seem.

Bread Soup (Zuppa di Pane)

• 1-½ cup chopped mixed fresh herbs, such as marjoram, thyme, basil, mint, arugula, and Italian parsley • 2 medium zucchini, cut into ½-inch dice • 8 ounces green beans, tops and tails removed and cut into 1-inch lengths • 1 pound russet potatoes, peeled and cut into 1-inch chunks • 2 ripe tomatoes, peeled and coarsely chopped • 1 spanish onion, cut into ¼-inch dice • 1 clove garlic, crushed • 8 cups cold water • Salt • Two 1-inch-thick slices thick Italian peasant bread, crusts removed • ½ small dried hot chile pepper or 1 teaspoon hot red pepper flakes • Freshly ground black pepper • ½ cup extra-virgin olive oil

Preparation

1. In a large pot, combine 1 cup of the herbs, the zucchini, green beans, potatoes, tomatoes, onion, garlic, and cold water. Add salt to taste and bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat to medium-low and cook, covered, until the potatoes are tender, 20 to 25 minutes. 2. Meanwhile, soak the bread briefly in water to cover, then squeeze to get rid of excess liquid. 3. Crumble the bread and add it to the soup, along with the chile pepper. Cook, stirring with a wooden spoon, until the bread has broken down and thickened the soup, about 10 minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste. 4. Ladle the soup into bowls, drizzle with the olive oil, and sprinkle with the remaining ½ cup chopped herbs.

Oh, what a beautiful morning

I was up really late last night, compelled by a very close basketball game. It took me a long time to calm down enough to sleep, so I was up until about 1 a.m.

Jellybean woke up early this morning (of course! Murphy's law of little kids) and came into the room before 7. She climbed into bed with me and said, "Tell me about baby chickens."

Huh?

I was still in a sleepy fog and she was persistent, so I managed to force my mouth form to words about, of all things, baby chickens.

About 25 minutes later, Peanut started chattering in her crib. I opened the door to her room, and without missing a beat, Peanut looked at me and said, "Watch this. Pbbbllllltttttt." She proceeded with some of the gnarliest raspberries I'd ever heard. She must have been working on those all night in her sleep. Quite the accomplishment.

Goes to show, you never know what goes through their little minds.

Misters and Misses

My girls, particularly Jellybean, have become fascinated with the Roger Hargreaves "Mr." and "Little Miss" books. Remember those from your childhood? They've been reissued, probably targeted at people like me who had them as a kid. I kept my old ones, so we have a few that mention non-PC things like cigars (gasp!).

Which got me thinking that it's time for a new group of Misters and Misses. Here are a few contemporary ones I've come up with while reading the old ones to my kids. I would love to write these and have them illustrated -- but then I would get my ass sued off, I'm sure. Wish I was arty, and I would have given you a visual concept of these. Feel free to add your own:

Mr. Postal
Mr. Metrosexual
Mr. Has Been
Mr. Pundit
Mr. Phobia
Mr. Debt
Mr. Chronic (thank you, Michael Phelps, for the inspiration)
Mr. Loser
Mr. Gangsta
Mr. Hipster
Mr. Workaholic
Mr. Playa

Little Miss People Pleaser
Little Miss Granola
Little Miss Famous
Little Miss Blogger
Little Miss Neurosis
Little Miss Manolos
Little Miss Diva
Little Miss Vegan
Little Miss Co-Dependent
Little Miss CEO
Little Miss Slut

Winter update

This is my fifth full winter of living in Michigan. And I can proudly say that it is my best winter here. Why? I credit my attitude 100%.

I decided last fall that I would work as hard as I could to embrace and accept the winter here as part of life -- instead of fighting it, cursing it and dreading it. (Actually, now that I'm looking back at that fall entry, I realize I have used the word "resolve," which puts me in a contrary position to another recent entry. Ahh, well. You can't win 'em all.)

So back to my "win" on the winter front. I have sailed through this winter, taking in stride even the coldest, most miserable days (more on that in a second). The girls and I have played outside in the snow and ice as much as possible. They have loved every minute. And I have loved them loving it. See, they're Michigan girls, unlike me. But I'm working on it.

And, I actually have found it funny -- in a "ha ha" way, not in a cynical torture way, for once -- that the winter I have chosen to embrace and accept is on track to be the coldest winter on record since 1880 and so far has the most snowfall ever for the period ending January 31. We have more snow on the ground than I've ever seen in my life. And I'm not bitching! I'm smiling.

Don't get me wrong, I won't be sad when spring arrives. But I also won't start my winter dread for NEXT winter on the first warm day -- yes, this has been my MO in the past, no wonder I couldn't stand it!