Mama's pillow

The girls and I have been fighting some ugly upper- and lower-respiratory crud for the past few weeks. I've felt worse for them than for me, because now you're not supposed to give little kids any kind of cold or cough medicine. At least I could medicate and feel a tad better. But what to do for them?

A spur-of-the-moment, middle-of-the-night fix I tried for Jellybean when she was about 18 months old has now become a sick-person ritual for us: Mama's pillow. If they're stuffed up and/or coughing, I prop my extra pillow behind their pillow so they can be elevated while they sleep. It has also turned into a comfort measure, with the girls saying that they feel better when my pillow is in their bed.

All right, so it's not the same as Ny-Quil, but it does help. And now I know when they're not feeling well, "Can I have Mama's pillow tonight to help me sleep?"

Beep-beep toilet time

We knew for months that we needed to potty train Peanut. She was interested and probably ready, but with a long road trip and all the chaos of the holidays, we decided to wait until January. And even then, there were a few days that I was wondering if it was ever going to happen.

Peanut has an independent streak that is a bit fiercer and edgier than Jellybean will ever likely muster. Everything has to be HER idea, and it should be done HER way. Not much different than many 2-year-olds, but with Peanut, there is no give.

The first couple days we were focusing on potty training, she just wasn't getting it. We used cotton training pants just like we did with Jellybean. Being wet didn't bother her in the least. I took the same approach we did with Jellybean: setting a timer every 30 minutes, which meant it was "toilet time." We managed to get the #2 in the toilet every time (mostly luck and persistence on our part), but the #1 was not happening. She didn't really cop an attitude, just demonstrated with her behavior that it wasn't going to be easy. But I wasn't going back. This was going to happen.

Sure enough, just like in her book, she woke up one day and stayed dry all day. Then the next day. And then the next day. And that was it. She heard that timer, announced, "Beep-beep toilet time!" and went running to the bathroom. It was HER idea now, and she was going to do it right. So right, in fact, that 2 weeks into it, she was staying dry every night and nap (good thing I bought about a million Pull-Ups, whoops!).

So, we are done with diapers! And, as soon as Jellybean can stay dry at night, we'll be done with Pull-Ups too. I continue to marvel at how this whole growing-up thing works.

What's your schedule?

When organizing our bookshelves the other day, I came across some old schedules and routines for the girls that I had typed up for babysitters. They involved a lot of diapers and bottles and tons of minute detail about how things should be done so as to maintain the status quo.

Now that the girls are getting older, the daily schedule and routines are much simpler. It got me wondering (as I often do) what other kids' -- and hence parents' -- schedules are like. Here's our current schedule. What is yours like?

7:30-7:45 a.m. Wake up
8 a.m. Breakfast
10 a.m. Morning snack
Noon Lunch
1 p.m. Peanut nap begins
1:45 Jellybean nap/quiet time begins
3:30ish Naps and quiet times done
3:45 Afternoon snack
5:30-6 Dinner
8 p.m. Get ready for bed, read a story
8:15-8:30 Bedtime

The inevitable conversation about death

The complicated, deep, involved conversations always happen when you least expect them. We were having lunch, bantering, our usual, when Jellybean started the following conversation. Luckily, I kept my composure, held back my tears and somehow, some way was able to hang with her. (Names are changed to protect the innocent)

Jellybean: Who are Grandma Kelly's parents?

Me: Her parents are my Grandma and Grandpa O'Neal.

J: Where are they?

Me: They died before you were born.

J: Was Grandma sad?

Me: Yes, very sad.

J: Does she miss them?

Me: Yes, and so do I.

J: Is she looking for new parents?

Me: No, you only have two parents, so those were her only parents. They would have LOVED you and been so proud of you. I know that for sure.

J: Who are Grandpa Dan's parents?

Me: My Grandma and Grandpa Brown.

J: Did they die too?

Me: Yes, they died before you were born.

J: Was Grandpa sad?

Me: Yes, he was very sad.

J: Does he get to have new parents?

Me: No, no one gets to have new parents. Grandma and Grandpa's parents were MY grandparents, and I got to go to their houses and play with them and have lots of fun like you do with your grandparents.

J: Do you miss them?

Me: So much, I think about them all the time.

J: Why did they have to die? Are you going to die?

Me: Yes, everyone dies eventually, even you will. But not for a really long time. Can you count to 100?

J: No!

Me: Well, that's how many years you get to live, or more.

When she asked if I was going to die, I just couldn't lie to her. I made a split-second decision that the truth was the way to go. What do you think about that? What would you have said?